Eater NY recently updated their Top Italian Restaurants in New York City. Most of the list feeds into the Downtown Manhattan social media hype train. Having been dragged to a handful of those spots by my wife, I wanted to offer some alternatives.

Hate Resy? Fughetaboutit! My first recommendation doesn’t even accept credit cards. Check out Don Peppe’s in Ozone Park. This place is old school. Cash only. Family style. Guys playing cards in the back. Shit, they don’t even give you menus. There’s one big board listings permanent items and your waiter will tell you about the specials.

I hate Staten Island as much as the next New Yorker, but how do you completely omit the borough from a list of top Italian restaurants. Might I suggest Nino’s Restaurant. They have a garden growing some of their produce. Talk about farm to fucking table. Huge wine list. Huge portions. Plus, you can probably get here, eat, and then get back to Manhattan before the four hour wait needed to sit at the end of the bar next to the bathroom at that place you saw on TikTok.

Speaking of omitted Italian neighborhoods. Why not venture to Howard Beach? Yes, the same Howard Beach you accidentally stepped into the first time you tried to take the AirTrain and mistakenly left the station. I’ll give you two here: Bruno’s Ristorante and Vetro Restaurant and Lounge. I prefer Bruno’s. The patrons at Vetro tend to dress up, so why don’t you use it as an opportunity to take off the pajamas you’ve been wearing for the last three years while working from home.

Are all these restaurants completely out of the way for you and in areas that you barely consider NYC? Welcome to New York you Midwestern transplant. Fine, I’ll give you one place that won’t take over an hour to get to: Trattoria L’incontro in Astoria. Some of the best service you’ll come across.

Ugh, none of these places are trendy enough. Plus, you’re planning to divorce your partner soon and you want to run up the credit card before you split. Drop your money bag at Cafe Mars. Menu and ambiance are as creative as any place on Eater’s list, and you don’t need to be a damn bot to make a reservation.

One last bonus suggestion. First, go into your kitchen and look in the cabinet where you keep your pasta sauces that expired three years ago. There’s a jar of Michael’s. Guess what?!? They have a restaurant in southern Brooklyn (not to be confused with South Brooklyn which is actually north of southern Brooklyn). They also have a pastry shop across the street.

I hope this inspires at least one of you to venture outside the West Village for some Italian food.

by jt92

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