I'm a pastry chef at a small Cafe. We got a new head chef 2 weeks ago who insists on making his own bread instead of letting me do it. He has no idea how to make bread. He pulled these monstrosities out of the oven and exclaimed, "Look at these butes!" His bread makes my blood boil and hurts me in my soul. I dunno how much longer I can put up with this.
by cookiesarenomnom
41 Comments
I’d be proud of those but Ive made baguettes exactly once in my life.
Hope you enjoy your next job.
My cellulite filled legs in pantyhose:
no scoring, no tapered ends, too thin to make a sandwich 😭😭😭
This makes my soul hurt
Make fake account. Post photo again. Title new post as “look these monstrosities local Cafe is charging money for”. Have people roast it in the comments. Tell new head chef you found this thread on reddit and it looks like it might be your Cafe. Hopefully have it change their tune.
He or she shouldn’t be your boss after saying something so false like that. That’s just a fact.
Your boss is delusional. I could do better blindfolded with my hands taped shut
Homeboy cant even shape a baguette without it hanging a hard left
I’m only a professional baker/pastry chef/chef/barista/whatever with 10-20 years experience and a few awards(three), so I have limited experience on this particular subject but… No. Those look like pizzles.
Pizzles that has been soaked in piss, rolled in cornmeal and are now plump with a gross looking crust.
Slap him and call him a buffoon.
Don’t let France find out or you might start an international incident.
r/shitfromabutt
How can a professional chef bake bread that badly?!! 😳
Have you ever seen the movie Tremors with Kevin Bacon…..
If you know, you know!
These look like dried elephant peen.
The second photo reminds me of severely calloused heels and I can’t unsee it.
Kinda looks like a really long Ciabatta
Oh my.
what they lack in physical beauty, scoring, shaping, consistency and smoothness they certainly make up for in … length? maybe the chef comes from some distant breadless country.
It looks like he’s baking the preshapes.
The comments are hilarious!
These comments are killing me. Hahahaha. These do look horrendous though my god. I would be embarrassed to put those in the case.
Your boss needs better vision coverage.
Paul Hollywood would not approve of those.
Maybe because I was thinking about deer, but I thought these were deformed deer legs for sale.
If those are for sandwiches…get the fuck out.
As a butter delivery system, I’m in!!
They look uncircumcised
Nah he said they were booty fool
I’m sorry, but these look like mummified horse peen 🤣
😵💫🫠😬🥴
They’ll make for decent croutons and bread crumbs, I hope.
Theyre shriveled and one has a hoof. 😬
Have they been mummified?
I thought these were mummified arms for a second
These are just terrible long ciabatta. Wtf
This is weaponized incompetence at best. Holy shit…I’ve seen better “baguettes” from a Panera…and that’s saying a lot
Your boss is blind AF
I concur
Sorry to hear, OP. If it’s any consolation, I went to culinary school, and although I no longer cook professionally, my dad and aunt are constantly trying to “teach me” how to cook. Their favorite recipe is one of the following things.
1) Steak covered in paprika and baked in the oven until overcooked.
2) Fish covered in paprika and baked in the oven until overcooked.
3) Chicken covered in a mixture of paprika and olive oil… and baked in the oven until overcooked.
Also, the secret family recipe for pasta sauce is one 28-ounce can of crushed tomatoes and one 6-ounce can of tomato paste. It has all the flavors; bitter and acidic.
Yes. Those are the complete recipes. No other ingredients. It’s insulting and embarrassing to make.
I’m trusting all of you good Redditors not to jot these down and publish a cookbook with them. 🙄
Why not just make some on your own and put them side by side?
I thought they were weird fish.
A face only a mother could love ❤️
My pastry chef tells me when I mess up my stuff looks “rustic.” I take that as, “it looks like shit, but we’ll sell it anyways” lol.